I found the gem called Michael Kiwanuka, thanks to an inflight music library. I instantly fell in love with his soulful, earnest voice loaded with pain and longing. This is song about internal struggle, about the past coming in the way of the present and the singer being aware of its tight clutches on his little heart that’s gone cold, so cold that it’s all that there is to it now.
The extended intro which lasts for over 5 mins, is the highlight of this long track. It stands firm and near complete in its own right, as if it’s said everything it had to, felt everything that was there to feel, gone down the spiral of multiple emotions of regret, pain, guilt, hope and a deep deep resignation, before the vocals rationalise things.
The slow start of soft vocals, almost moaning at first, like innocent ripples of feelings, harmless at first, transcend into intense sounds by joining the deep guitars. The constant strum, a lump of many things all at once, and then MK’s late vocals capture the realised truth; an apology of sorts with a mild streak of hope and trust in his lover’s belief into a possibility of ‘them’.
Reminds me of Pink’s ‘Don’t Let Me Get Me’ and Julia Roberts’ character in the movie Closer. When one knows that they are their biggest enemy and they just know that it won’t work out because of them. The painful truth striping them off of the privilege of blame.